found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
Randomize
