That's when you crack a 10am beer
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize