I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
