Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
