btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
