she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
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