Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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