Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I love black thongs
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
