oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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