There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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