I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize
