I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize