We won't sleep together?
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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