try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
