Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
