hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
