meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
