Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
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