office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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