im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
