Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
