Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize
