You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize