Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
The Royals are in the World Series. I've never drank so much in one week in my life.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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