oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Randomize
