Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
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