i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
