No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
