so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize