You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
