So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
