you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
