Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
