And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
3pm strippers are depressing
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Randomize
