This dress was meant to end up on your floor
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Randomize
