I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
