When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize
