I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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