You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
