it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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