Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
