So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
