absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize
