I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
