My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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