Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
