That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize