3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Someone shit on the floor
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
Randomize
