those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
