Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
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