she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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